I Do NOT Like Birthdays

I am only 34 but HATE the thought of another birthday. Ever since I hit my 30, I always think about “death”. Not that I want to die, the complete opposite. I am always thinking it won’t be long and I will be in my forties, then fifties, then sheesh soon I will be asking my kids to take care of me. I wish the days went by slower….

Yesterday was my Nana’s birthday. She is in her seventies and to tell you the truth, I don’t want to know her exact age. She has been a big part of my life growing up and she is not always going to be there. Since death is so FINAL, I just wish the world would freeze time for a bit (maybe just a year or two please). I want my Nana to see my kids have kids and sad to say, it probably won’t happen. Maybe for my oldest, but definitely not my youngest who is only 2.

So instead of being super happy about my Nana’s birthday, it kind of brought me down. I did pack up the kids and took a trip to her house. We surprised her with an Elvis blanket that we found on our trip to Hollywood last month. She LOVED it. Her house is full of Elvis collectibles, clocks and whatever else the family and I have found Elvis related throughout the years (my poor grandpa). We also surprised her with a Lemon Meringue Pie which has always been one of her favorites. While I wish I could have made one homemade, I cheated and bought one.

So anyhow, while birthdays are supposed to be fun, they just mean getting OLDER to me…… What I am thankful is being able to stay at home with my family and seeing my kids grow. Working from home is the best reward I could ever ask for…………. Instead of someone else getting to see my son’s first everythings, it is my turn!