Coparenting can be difficult in your family’s day to day lives, and during special occasions, those difficulties can become even worse. If you and your coparent are planning on throwing a party for your child or children, it doesn’t have to be a harrowing experience. To throw a great party for your child with your coparent, keep the tips below in mind during the planning process as well as during the party itself.

Decenter Yourselves

Your child’s birthday party is not about you and your coparent. It’s all about your child and their special day — make sure that you remember that. If there are any issues or disagreements, make sure to always bring your thoughts back to your child and what will make them happiest. Don’t let yourself get into a petty fight with your coparent, only to have it impact the experience for your child.

Another positive of decentering yourself in order to give your child the best possible party is that you are setting a wonderful example for your children. If you and your coparent constantly fight, your child will see that as an acceptable and normal form of communication, despite the fact that it is not. Showing that you and your coparent can still work together is an important part of ensuring that your children aren’t harmed by your divorce or separation.

Keep the Location Neutral

When you’re planning where to have the party, it’s important to reach a decision that is neutral and not upsetting to you or your coparent. There are approximately 827,000 divorces each year, so you are not the first family to have this struggle, and you are far from the last. There are two main options for where to host the party: at a coparent’s house or in a public place. If you’re having the party at one of your homes, consider alternating years or otherwise making it more of an equally shared responsibility. Obviously, you can have the party at the same home every year if it’s the best choice for your family, but if it’s a point of contention, try to switch it up.

If you and your coparent begin arguing about whose home to have the party at, having it in a public place is definitely the best option. There are countless places to have a child’s party, from a park in your city or town to a bowling alley and everywhere in between. Play up your child’s current interests and take into account the approximate size of the party that you’ll be throwing.

Communicate Effectively

Effective communication is an extremely important tool of coparenting at all times, not just while you’re planning a party. It’s important to have a discussion with your coparent about the expectations and budget for the party. If you are imagining an extravagant 150 person party with entertainment and catering and your coparent is thinking of a small at-home gathering of 30 people with homemade food and treats, you will absolutely have to reconcile your gathering expectations. While you’re compromising, make sure that you are planning on inviting people that fall on both sides of the aisle. If you invite your parents, make sure that your inlaws are also receiving an invitation to the party.

A good way to help center your child in the party planning process is to actually have them make decisions. However, make sure that whatever decisions you’re having them help make you aren’t forcing them to choose between your child’s other parent and yourself. Making them choose between their parents is not a healthy mentality to have, and it could negatively impact them down the road.

For example, if your daughter has her Sweet Sixteen coming up, you can have her make most of the decisions regarding decorations, the basic guest list, and other major decisions. In case you don’t know, a sweet sixteen is a party that represents a girl’s coming of age and is thrown to celebrate her sixteenth birthday. Since the party is a representation of her growing up, you should let her make a lot of the decisions. This also makes it easier for you and your coparent since all you have to do is approve or deny decisions made by your daughter. Before you turn the decision making over to your daughter, though, make sure that you agree on the bigger picture things like the budget and the date of the party.

Share Responsibilities

Make sure that while you’re throwing this party, you are both contributing as equally as you possibly can. You don’t want either of you to feel like you’re a single parent throwing the party alone — you are coparents, so although you might technically be single parents, you aren’t contributing to the number of children who are raised by one parent, which comes out to about 22.4 million, or 27% of children under 21.

If you try to do everything yourself, you’ll get overwhelmed, so delegating tasks between the two of you, and even other family members, can be really helpful in the party planning process. Make sure that when you and your coparent are deciding on party planning details that you come up with a method of how to delegate tasks as you go.

Make a Pinterest

Pinterest boards are a great tool for throwing any party. You can easily make your coparent a collaborator of a board on Pinterest, and then you can both add your ideas to the board. It makes it easier to see exactly what your coparent is imagining for the party and what you are imagining, which can make it easier to combine your visions. If your child is old enough to contribute, they can also become a collaborator on the board so that their ideas for the party are also shared and shown to have equal importance to you and your coparent.

Coparenting can be hard and throwing parties can be hard, but throwing a party with your coparent doesn’t have to be hard. If you work together and communicate effectively, you can throw a great party for your child’s birthday, graduation, recital, or other special events that you may want to have a party for.

The holiday season is nearly upon us, which means it’s time to start gift shopping for that special someone in your life. But how will you know when you come across the perfect gift? If you’re stuck for inspiration, here are a few excellent gift ideas to consider for your special someone this holiday season.

Gift an Accessory

If your significant other has a well-cultivated personal style and loves to accessorize, then an item to add to their wardrobe might be the perfect gift to consider this holiday season. Almost 38 million Americans will buy fine jewelry or watches in a given year, anyway. Not sure what kind of accessory your special someone would love the most? Here are a few options to consider when you’re browsing for gifts.

Earrings – Earrings are some of the most versatile accessories you can give to someone as a gift. There are countless styles that can go with just about any wardrobe out there. If your significant other has a bolder style, maybe a pair of statement earrings will be perfect. If they’re more elegant and understated, maybe a pair of diamond or pearl studs could be a timeless gift. Rock the perfect piece for everyday wear and have a timeless vibe or glam with the huggie earrings collection from Adina Eden.

Scarves – Is winter your significant other’s favorite season? If they love getting cozy while staying stylish, a high-quality scarf could be an excellent gift option to consider. If your partner likes big statement pieces, a blanket scarf could be perfect.

Watches – Watches are not only an excellent accessory to add style to any outfit, but they’re also a very practical gift to give someone. Instead of using your phone to check the time, you get to look at a gorgeous watch. It’s also easy to coordinate a watch to your significant other’s wardrobe.

Gift an Experience

If you’re not really one for material gifts, it’s never a bad idea to consider gifting an experience to your significant other. If there’s a local event they love to attend every year, consider looking into presale tickets so you can go together. Concert tickets are another excellent experience-based gift. If you find out that a group your partner likes is playing in your area soon, purchase a pair of tickets as a surprise for them. Not only will it be a great date night for you two, but it will be a great opportunity to gift your loved one with an experience they’ll enjoy. Alternatively, your experience-based gift could be traveling. Maybe you and your partner have always wanted to go to Las Vegas. The 104 casinos in the valley make it an appealing vacation spot. And the earlier you book plane tickets, the more likely you are to score a great deal.

Gift a Useful Tool

Finally, it pays to pay attention to what your significant other says they need or want for things they do around the house. Whether they need a tool for their crafting hobby or a stand mixer to improve their bread recipe in the kitchen, the gift of useful tools never gets old. And more often than not, this is the kind of gift that your partner will get years of use from. Practical gifts, whether for a hobby or for a common household task like cooking, are always a great option to turn to when you’re not sure if a more frivolous gift would be appropriate. When in doubt, ask your partner if there’s anything that would help make their life easier or help them get back into a hobby they’ve been neglecting. This will usually give you a good idea of some practical items that need to make their way into your home.

Picking gifts for the special someone in your life, though not as stressful as planning a wedding, can still be a big challenge. If you’re clean out of ideas, use these suggestions as inspiration to get you started on your gift hunt.

In a year plagued with police brutality incidents that made headlines and sparked international protests, the shooting of Jacob Blake has sparked even more intense conversations regarding excessive force and the potential targeting of black men by police. The shooting of Blake involved seven shots that made impact and were caught on camera. However, due to camera angles and the intensity of the confrontation, many Americans remain confused about exactly what happened. Normally, body cameras would be relied upon to clarify exactly what occurred during the shooting and the confrontation that led up to the shots being fired. But it has recently been revealed that the Kenosha Police involved in the shooting were not wearing body cameras, prompting further questions and making a distressing situation even more bewildering.

The video footage of Blake and the Kenosha Police involved showed Blake walking around to a parked vehicle on the street. Three officers had their weapons pointed at Blake, and one was seen grabbing Blake’s shirt and firing at close range. At this time, it is not completely clear whether or not all seven shots were fired by the same officer, though it is clear that seven bullets did hit Blake. Potentially, body cameras would have revealed exactly what the circumstances of the shooting were, or at least who fired which shots. But because the Kenosha Police lacked body cameras, an objective account of the incident remains elusive.

According to reports made by local media, the reason why the Kenosha Police on the scene lacked body cameras is that none of the officers in the department have been fitted with them. Body cameras are not universally required for police departments across the United States, and in some areas, they remain controversial. In recent years, activists and politicians alike have heightened their demands for law enforcement officers to wear body cameras, particularly in the cases of officers who will be in high contact situations with civilians. There has been some degree of progress in terms of state police and highway patrol vehicles utilizing in-car cameras. In the year 2000, just 11% of all state police and highway patrol vehicles possessed these cameras. Twenty years later, roughly 72% of all state patrol vehicles featured these systems. Although this is an improvement, it remains to be seen whether or not police departments like the one in Kenosha will be outfitted with body cameras. Though in-car camera systems are useful and necessary, and can sometimes provide even better footage than body cameras during vehicular stops, they are stationary and cannot follow the officers out of the car. Furthermore, they can sometimes be obscured by accident in a way that body cameras cannot be. This is why Kenosha County Board Supervisor Zach Rodriguez called for body cameras following the shooting of Jacob Blake, suggesting that the shooting only emphasized how crucial these specific types of cameras are.

Some may believe that the need for body cameras by law enforcement is an issue that is clear and that there is no excuse for law enforcement officers going without body cameras. While excuses may not be found, there have been explanations provided. The question for many is whether or not those explanations will be accepted by a public that is demanding that law enforcement officers are held accountable for their actions.

Why The Kenosha Police Lacked Body Cameras

One explanation for why the Kenosha Police did not have the necessary body cameras is that they simply lacked the funds necessary. Body cameras are not automatically a part of the department’s budget, and therefore it can be difficult for a new budget that includes body cameras to be approved. However, in 2017, city and law enforcement leaders unanimously endorsed the use of body cameras. Not only were they recognized as a means through which police accountability could be enforced, but it was also suggested that they could be used to collect valuable evidence. The cost of the body cameras was what evidently changed their minds initially, though there were also police concerns cited. Though body cameras were not completely rejected, the implementation of body camera was put off, leading up to the shooting of Jacob Blake.

The issue is that the footage of what occurred regarding the shooting could just as easily show circumstances in the officers’ favor as it would show evidence of wrongdoing (which of course would still be valuable). As of now, the public only has footage that shows part of the incident, rather than the entire incident. Furthermore, this footage was easily widely distributed. Right now, videos are growing to become one of the most popular types of content that users consume. With YouTube having 2 billion visitors every month, there are plenty of opportunities for such videos to be consumed in a limited form, without context. Though there is no guarantee that body camera footage would provide a preferable context, it’s important for this to be made available.

The Future of Body Cameras For The Kenosha Police

In the subsequent protests within Kenosha, as well as those responding to the shooting across the country, have led some residents to hope that there will be increased pressure on the police and city officials to implement body cameras. According to Kenosha Mayor John Antaramian, there are plans to buy body cameras for the Kenosha Police in 2022. As of now, there are already cameras in the officers’ squad cameras, though it is yet to be revealed if any of them captured the shooting of Jacob Blake. Though these plans are promising, Antaramian initially endorsed body cameras in 2017, which leaves some skeptical.

Kenosha has long lacked the number of body cameras for its police force that other police forces of a similar size possess. Body cameras are not only crucial to law enforcement reform, but to rebuilding the trust between the community and the police officers at work. But it remains to be seen if Kenosha will fulfill the promises made by 2022.

When your teen is just starting their career as a licensed driver, it can be tough to accept the fact that they’re growing up. And when you consider that the Ohio State Highway Patrol reported almost 380 fatalities related to driving under the influence, it can be even tougher to let your teen walk out the door with car keys in hand. You’ve taught them how to pump gas, and even a little history about how fuel companies like Sunoco have been operating for almost 130 years. They know how to use their turn signals and brake safely. But if you’re worried about your teen staying safe and aware of the dangers of driving while impaired, here are a few tips to pass on.

Review the Laws Surrounding Drinking and Driving

Underage drinking happens all the time. That being said, you should impress upon your teen that just because it happens doesn’t make it legal. The legal drinking age is 21. If your teen is under 21, they need to hear your reminder about the legal drinking age. And if they’re still not convinced that underage drinking is a bad thing, remind them that in states like Michigan, a “zero tolerance” policy is in effect for drivers under the age of 21. That means any alcohol in their system, whether it’s well below the legal limit or not, is grounds for DUI charges and license revocation.

Once you’ve reviewed that point, it’s time to review the laws concerning drinking and driving. While states like Michigan might have a zero-tolerance policy in effect, the laws in most states cite that a blood alcohol content (BAC) at or above 0.08% is grounds for a DUI charge. But even if the law cites a certain BAC, it’s important to let your teen know that even one drink can prove fatal if they get behind the wheel of a vehicle afterward.

Let Your Teen Know it’s Okay to Call

You know you can trust your teen to never get behind the wheel after drinking. But how much do you trust their friends? At this point, you need to make sure your teen understands that getting into a car with another impaired person behind the wheel is just as (if not more) dangerous as getting behind the wheel themselves after a drink. Let your teen know that if they ever find themselves in a situation like this, it’s okay to call you for a ride. In fact, ask specifically that they do. One of the most important things you can do as a parent teaching a new driver is to let them know that you won’t judge them, but that you do want them to be as safe as possible. So if they’re ever uncomfortable driving or getting in the car with a group of friends, they need to know that you’ll be there to support them.

Be a Good Role Model

If you, like many other parents out there, enjoy the occasional drink over dinner with friends, it’s important that you set a good example for your teen. If you and your spouse take your family for dinner, make a point to have a conversation about who will be the designated driver, and why. And if you and your spouse both want to have a drink or two, make a point to include your teen in the conversation about transportation to and from your destination. Have your teen call a ride-hailing service for you if you think that would help set a good example. Even into adulthood, your kids will look to you for advice and life lessons. Setting a good example with your drinking behavior can go a long way in helping your teen stay safe on the road. It might be fun to share history lessons about fast cars like the Shelby Cobra and tell stories about ridiculous things you and your friends did when you were your teen’s age, but it might be better to save those for a time when you’re not actively teaching your teen about the dangers of drinking and driving.

Teaching your teen about being a safe driver and the dangers of driving under the influence isn’t always an easy experience. But with these tips, you can be sure that you got the message across to your teen about being a safe driver.